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O beautiful for spacious lies

Politics | Friday, May 12th, 2006 | 11 years, 0 months ago

Gary McKinnon breaks into government and military computers with no passwords and the Bush administration holds 10 million American citizens under the magnifying glass. The government combs the country with a fine tooth comb while an overseas hobbyist easily acquires access to the country’s best-kept secrets. 10 years prior, Mathew Bevan broke into the same agencies with nearly the same tactics. Technology has advanced ahundredfold in 10 years and the government hasn’t adapted one iota.

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Osama bin PERL Script

I’m no conspiracy theorist, but this seems exceptionally suspicious to me. War is an expensive and, for some, profitable venture. Like the vaccination industry, war makes money with treatment, not cures or prevention.

A hell of a lot of money is spent by any government on manpower whose collective work is stored on computer networks. This work contains information about the operation of the country, its populace, its triumphs and shortcomings. Government databases essentially contain blueprints on constructing – or disassembling – a country, step by step.

Any hacker will tell you that the most easily exploited factor in a computer network is people. No matter how tight your security, no matter how obscured your resources, all it takes is a slick talker to convince some corporate lackey that they have the right to important data. “Any hacker” should talk to the US government because they are the one organization ANYWHERE that makes it easy enough for hackers that they don’t even need to talk to a person to gain illegal entry.

There is an ongoing debate over whether accessing private, unsecured wireless networks should be illegal. The internet is an open protocol for any and all to access, and wireless access points provide a means of connection to the internet via the owner’s private network. An unsecured, unencrypted WAP is like putting a cable TV on your front lawn for anyone to watch – a service provided to the community.

The US government provides a very, very, VERY generous service to the community – they allow anyone to log into their networks without a password to do as they wish. They allow you to connect to their networks, log in, access data, convince IT administrators of your authorization through an anonymous text chat, disconnect, and reconnect as often as you like for a year. All for the low, low price of Americans’ right to privacy and national dignity! Act now! … or much later!

“But the internet is a quickly evolving place with dangerous hackers evolving even quicker,” you tighty righties tell me (in my imagination). You’re right, you brilliant beasts, you. However, the government is not evolving with them, despite the fact that the EXACT SAME THING HAPPENED almost 10 years ago. You’d think a military-employed IT security specialist would think to password protect network computers. Connected to the internet. Over the course of 10 years. No.

9/11 has been the grease on the wheels of oppression for the Bush administration for a term and a half now. As a result, the airline industry, already hanging on by a thread, is forced to rectally probe Americans that walk through any doorway in a terminal, and to really toss the salad of any medium-skinned visible minority. It’s all justified. After all, 9/11 was the result of some commercial airliners being hijacked, right? Right? It looks like it from some angles – like the 24-hour-a-day hysterical yammering on CNN. But from the other end of the spectrum, the end with NEWS and FACTS from CITIZENS, a very different story is told. If a supposed plane crashes into the Pentagon, why conceal the wreckage under a tarp?!? etc., etc., etc., etc., etc., etc., etc., etc.

But you Yanks eat this shit up, don’t you? You love being spied on, lied to, and restricted, don’t you? Yes, you do. You’re in good hands, after all. You’ve re-elected a well-loved leader with a respectable family. A president who respects the separation of church and state. A wartime president with a celebrated military record.

It is my opinion that America is addicted to terror. They love it. It’s their raison d’etre. Decade after decade, war after war, always “America, fuck yeah!” And why shouldn’t they love it? It’s a profitable venture. Bush has no qualms trading boys for bucks, and boys are free! It’s the perfect crime!

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Your tired and your poor were delish. Pass your huddled masses.

So why spend oodles of bucks defending your country? Preventing war is no way to make a buck. Fortify the pillars of Americanism – Smith and Wesson, CNN, and coffin makers – or you’re a communist!

And hell, while we’ve got a Bush-blowing sock puppet for a prime minister, let’s have Canada secretly fund a war that its citizens unanimously disapprove of. So sneaky, Mr. Harper. “Me love you long time, Mr. Bush! Call me! Please? Me so horny!”

Being born in Montreal, the Quebec referendum upset me greatly. Even though it failed to pass a vote of 51% to 49%, it still troubled me to see how many Canadians felt incongruent with the country’s ideals. Having read the words of a similar-minded American I have newfound sympathy for Quebec separatists. At the time I thought it was just a pantload, but maybe the biggest countries really aren’t big enough for their own populations. After all, I would hate to live in a country full of closed-minded, racist neanderthals like this George W. Douchebag.

I love you, America. I cry for you. I empathise with you. But I will never bleed for you. I cannot respect the republic for which you stand. I don’t know why you do.

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2 Comments

  1. Well now…

    When are you going to issue your apology?

    Looks like Bush was right, after all.

    Obama and the Democrats are the ones to really fear…

    Comment by stupid_canadians — November 21, 2009 @ 9:56 pm

  2. I just reread my article and I didn’t think I could ever read anything stupider or crazier, but then I read your comment.

    Comment by Brian — November 22, 2009 @ 12:35 pm

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